i don't plan on having that self control this summer
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Randomize
