Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
