I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
Randomize
