you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
Can't talk, ducks in the car
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Randomize
