She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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