He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
The good news is that I can 100% reassure you that you did not get knocked up by some creepy Italian dude named Sal Manella last night.
The bad news is that you will never know the name of the guy who may have gotten you pregnant last night because he clearly gave you a fake name, sweetie.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
Randomize
