Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
Randomize
