i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
I pour the whiskey from now on
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Randomize
