i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
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