So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize