Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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