im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
Randomize
