I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
foreskin is a definite game changer
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
Randomize
