8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
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