I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
