Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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