do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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