its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
Randomize