Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
I drank a fishbowl of liquor and next thing I know I'm sliding into Zach Galifinakis' DMs
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
Randomize
