why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
Randomize