It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
FUCK WHALES
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Randomize
