Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Randomize
