Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
