I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
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