I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize
