Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
Life without a bra equals bliss.
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
Randomize