the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
Randomize
