I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
