my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
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