everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
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