to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
And my parents said I crawled through the house
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
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