I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
