Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize
