I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Randomize
