mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Randomize
