he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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