god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
True true and the only thing that will burn more than the vodka we will consume is the shame in our loved one's eyes
And yet we make it a tradition to get inappropriately drunk at family functions. We amaze me.
At least it's not a funeral this time... I feel we're making improvements.
I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
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