Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Randomize