Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
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