Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
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