I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
Randomize
