I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
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