he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
YAS. BRING CRAB.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
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