im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
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