He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
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