Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
he just fucked me for my cheese..
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