Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
are you so shy because you have an std?
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
Randomize
