that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
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