You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
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