worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
Randomize